


Chicken Blues

by Ozzker



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Developing Friendships, Gen, Hospitalization, Implied/Referenced Suicide attempt, Male-Female Friendship, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Self-Esteem Issues, Starting Over, don't wanna misuse the drug tags but somebody is on medical drugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:15:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25422271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ozzker/pseuds/Ozzker
Summary: Emily visits Shane's hospital room in search of a heart to heart.(Despite tags, light-hearted until the near end. An unnamed farmer, Harvey, Gus and Pam are referenced or appear, but not enough for a tag.)
Relationships: Emily & Shane (Stardew Valley)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 15





	Chicken Blues

**Author's Note:**

> My first posted work ever, criticisms would be appreciated (including for the tags, not sure I understand the system).
> 
> For context, it's fairly canon aligned, but 1) Emily has a sixth sense (which isn't explicit in canon), 2) of course I'm interpreting and adding to their relationship, and 3) all the medical aspects have not been researched in detail (from the medicine's effects to Shane's behavior, so not related to canon but still is context lol).
> 
> I wrote it in one sitting with minimal editing (airplane rides sigh), but two BETA readers enjoyed it, so I hope y'all do too.

“Shane, I-...”

Emily’s smile twitched and faltered along with the sentence. It wasn’t a lack of words with which to express herself, rather the sheer amount, unfiltered and vibrant in her mind. Far too little words for the severity of the situation, yet far too many for someone like Shane. But what did she know about Shane? Despite speaking to each other almost every evening for years, none of their conversations were sincere or earnest. She never noticed, somehow. Perhaps that ‘some’ is also ‘how’ she never noticed he needed help. Any help. Hindsight is 20/20, but, with someone like Shane, justifying her lack of awareness feels impossible. It wasn’t like he made any attempt to suppress his feelings.  
Now they were sitting here, one in a hospital bed and one next to it.

“Shane. As a friend, I...” She bit her tongue back, already regretting her choice of words. The lack of recognition in his eyes did not encourage her. “I let you down. You did not deserve any of-“

“Were we ever even friends?”

The first coherent sentence he uttered since her arrival. Perhaps the first of his hospital stay, hoarse voice echoing, and it was that whatever that was - phrased as an accusation, yet lacking a single drop of malice. Her faux smile morphed into a confused, yet intrigued scowl. Whichever direction the conversation takes, she reasoned, would be more genuine, thus better than any they had before.

“Maybe it’s the meds talking or maybe even what Harvey said earlier, but...” Shane started after a moment of processing her reaction, although she couldn’t begin to fathom to what conclusion, “I don’t know you. At all.”

“What? Surely you’re-“

“Here. Watch this.” There was an uncharacteristic excitement in his gestures, giddiness more befitting of Elliott babbling about a new project. “I know you put your own clothes together... No, that’s- Was it sewing? Knitting? Uh, I’ll go with making, making your own clothes.”

Emily could not believe her senses. All six of them. In a surreal turn of events (albeit her definition of surreal was off), the imprint of his aura was forming in her sixth eye. Until that exact moment, she believed it imperceptible to her. The aura of introverts only emerges in solitude, she learned via watching Sebastian stand in the rain, and grumpy townspeople tend to be, well, introverted.  
Was Shane...an extrovert? But how? How thick was his mask...?

Sitting up, perhaps too far forward for the tubes attached to his arm, he held up three fingers in front of her face. Had he been waiting for her to...stop thinking? AND grew impatient? That was somehow incredibly thoughtful, yet childish, not like Shane at all. It warmed her heart. Positive he had regained her attention, he began again, pointing at each finger in turn.

“First, you love making clothes. Second, you love gems, the purple ones and the green ones, and the yellow ones- Maybe all of them! Thir- You use them for making clothes? No, that doesn’t count- That was a guess. Third, you work at the Stardrop, a bartender and... That’s it. That’s everything I-“  
His eyes thinned and he grimaced, deep in an abrupt thought. She could practically see the Junimos working hard to bring the bits and pieces of vague concepts to his brain. His eyes widened as swiftly as they thinned.  
“Wait, you have a sister, right? Harvey- No- What?! Oh Joba, I meant... Harley...? No! Haleigh! It’s gotta be Haleigh, right?”

She chuckled with a nod, seeing no reason to correct his pronunciation.  
A genuine smile crossed his feature, his FIRST genuine smile with which she had been graced, only to be followed by a bashful shrug and a swift shake of his head.

“I should’ve known that- Well, I did, but I’m so hopped up on... I don’t even know what, man...” he mumbled as he sank back into his bed, covering his face with the free arm: “That’s how the therapists get you, Em...”

“Spea-“

“Did I just call you ‘Em’- What?”

“Speaking of therapists...” Her voice dropped into a shaky low, chest tightening. “Will you be seeing one?”

“Well, if Harvey has anything to do with it (and he has everything to do with it), y-yes...?” His pitch rose as if he was reading the information off a teleprompter for the first time. “Some gal from... Zuzu City...”

Listening to Shane talk about something positive unrelated to Jas or Charlie was odd. She never noticed how emotive his voice was when he was relaxed. Has she ever seen him relaxed when sober? She couldn’t recall.

“What-“, he jumped as if her thought had startled him: “What was I talking about before...?”

“Our friendship…Or lack thereof.” The longer the conversation went, the more convinced she was of his point.

“Oh- Yeah, yeah...” he sat up once again, another wave of excitement passing over his face. “Y’know ‘quality over quantity’?”

She nodded with a gentle, but controlled smile, fighting the urge to ask how much he had thought about the state of their friendship without bringing it up.

“Yes, alright, well, we got the quantity. But none of the quality.” Collecting his thoughts, Em could sense the conversation was about to take a turn. His aura suddenly twisted into a knot as every hint of excitement disappeared from his face. Eyes wide and brows ever so slightly lowered, his voice grew raspy: “This isn’t your fault... Y’know that, right?”

She almost nodded out of habit. “It’s partially my fault.”

“How.”

“I never asked you about your problems.”

He snorted: “Like I would’ve willingly allowed that! I would’ve shot you down in a second or- Or, uhh... just left...”

Was that guilt on his face? We can’t have that, can we?

“You sound like you’re talking about a separate entity from yourself,” Emily noted, earning a blank stare from Shane. His spirit was visibly about to sink, when: “We should never ignore the possibility that you’re possessed by an evil spirit. Have you ever woken up in the chicken coop despite falling asleep in your bed?”

“Of course.”

“That answer was far too fast.”

“You.”

“Me?”

“You...Are you the therapist Harvey hired?”

They both laughed, even though neither found the joke particularly funny.

A small pang of grief found its way into her laugh as something occurred to her. What will happen when the medicine wears off and whatever caused his usual behavior comes back in full force? Will it all go back to how it was? She swore an oath to herself. Revealing a secret oath would ruin its purpose, but her first course of action? Stocking the Stardrop with sparkling water, she thought with a benevolent smile.

“Do you want to be my, uh- My friend?”

The question severed her from her thoughts. His free arm was sticking out for a shake. A concerned giggle escaped her mouth.

He was blushing. “I know, I know, but- This. This is important to me. It’s like- Uhh…Think of it as a platonic engagement ring? If that makes sense…”

She took his hand with both of her own and held it. His eyes were repelled by the sight.

“I’m... I-I just want you to promise that if I try to become a better friend, you’ll stick by. My side. And maybe even try as well...okay?”

A wry smile sprung forth from her lips. “Shane, we are going to become the best fucking friends in this shitty town.”

“Woah! Wh- Hey! Watch your fUCKING LANg-” Those final chuckles punctuated their first (and highest) sincere heart to heart.

Muttering a tiny ‘g’ night’, he drifted away a few moments later. As she left the hospital, waving at a rather baffled Harvey, she wondered who Shane’s true self was and when he would introduce them.

***

“I said WHAT?!”

Shane’s exclamation echoed through the relatively empty bar. Gus’ desperate attempts to stop himself from eavesdropping were brought to a halt as Pam let out a drunken holler. It was but a day after their first sincere conversation and Shane had already forgotten everything he said.

“Yes! You also asked me to be your friend. Your friend! Can you imagine?!” Em responded with an innocent smile as she slid sparkling water across the bar. Shane’s aura was exploding into embers around him, bouncing around the room in an erratic manner, although Em could’ve known that by his flushed face alone. “Then we got platonically married.”

“What the f-... What does that even mean?!”

“It means” She opened the glass bottle. It fizzed and gained Shane’s entire attention. “We’ll be the best of the best of friends!”

The knuckle of his hand around the bottle went white. His expression was stern, but, as was the norm, his aura was uncertain. Everything he had said the day before was genuine, even though he would’ve expressed it differently, had he the chance. She smiled to herself as he sat down and let out a sigh: “It was really that bad, huh?”

Her senses picked up far too much hopelessness in his words. She raised an eyebrow, picking up a dish to clean, and he continued: “My attempt.”

Attempt?

“The farmer made it sound like Harvey thought I was a goner.”

Emily almost broke the dish. Attempt...? She never asked how he ended up in the hospital. “You... You tried to...?”

Shane scowled, despite not feeling any anger. “You didn’t know?”

“All I knew was that- Alcohol poisoning.” She looked downwards. It made sense when she thought about it. He’s been drinking at the saloon every night, yet he’s never-

“No, I-I tried to roll off the cliff in...Cindersap Forest, but the farmer...” Emily could usually feel when Gus wanted to say something, yet today she didn’t feel him staring into her back. Shane grew even more uncertain: “Why- If you didn’t know, why did you make that promise...?”

As she thought, she could sense Shane growing more and more fearful. Now that she had formed a bond with him, realizing his emotions was easy, but she never would’ve guessed how volatile they were. It was becoming more and more unbearable until she realized why it was hard to bear, which was the answer to his question.

“Because you’re my friend and you don’t deserve to be alone, Shane.”

He slammed the bottle on to the bar and covered his face. The silence was striking. Emily didn’t understand what she said wrong.

Gus gave her a pat on the shoulder and motioned to the door. She gave him a nod, untying her apron. “Shane, I have no idea what any of this is about, but if you ever need my help, you know where to find me.”

“I’m not drunk enough for this...!” he muttered through his teeth, so distressed that his lack of tears became impressive. Emily gently picked him up by the arm and they left.

“Do you want to go home?”

“No.”

“How about the beach...?”

“...Sure...” he regained his composure, but he was just as distressed. Perhaps Em preferred when she wasn’t painfully aware of what he was going through. After a second of thought, she changed her mind.

“...I’m such a dumbass...”

“No, no, you aren’t,” she whispered back, receiving a remorseful glance from him: “Sometimes we get overwhelmed. That is fine.”

“But I’m always overwhelmed.”

“Well, that’s why recovery exists, right...?”  
After a moment of deliberation, he nodded. She continued: “I can’t blame you for being overwhelmed today. You did just-“, she paused, unable to comprehend it, “Try to...End it all- Shane,” she paused: “Bottling up your emotions will just make them a problem.”

“I’m aware... I-I deal with them every day. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me anymore…”

Emily stopped herself from saying what she wanted because it was irrelevant. Even if there was something wrong with him, he deserves happiness. As they entered the beach, she asked: “Do you want to talk about it?”

“...sure...”


End file.
